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Showing posts with label anzac humour. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anzac humour. Show all posts

Friday, April 29, 2011

Murphy's lesser known laws...


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Murphy's lesser known laws...







Murphy's Lesser Known Laws...



Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.



He who laughs last, thinks slowest.



Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.



Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.



Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.



The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.



If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog



The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.



Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.



Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.



The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.



A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.



When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

Monday, January 18, 2010

What is the similarity? A bit of Anzac humour...

What is the similarity? A bit of Anzac humour...

Aussie Bob and Kiwi Pete were enjoying a few beers after a barbie, and got talking about delicacies from their respective countries. After a while Kiwi Pete asked Aussie Bob the following question. "What is the similarity between an Aussie and a kiwifruit?"

"Dunno mate." replied Aussie Bob.

"Well, they are both brown and hairy on the outside, and very green on the inside." stated Kiwi Pete.

"Yeah, brown and hairy on the outside, that's us, mate!" skited Aussie Bob.

"And green as a kiwifruit on the...." demanded Pete.

"Dunno, don't get that part, Kiwi?" questioned Bob.

"Don't worry about it mate. Just give us another beer, Bob