Mortuary attendant impregnated by corpse...

Ads

• The Mortuary at Amazon.co.uk
  Low Prices on The Mortuary. Free UK Delivery on Amazon Orders
  www.amazon.co.uk

Mortuary attendant impregnated by corpse. Plans to sue the dead man's estate. She will be charged with necrophilia.

 http://www.deadseriousnews.com/?p=524

http://communitybloggersevolve.blog.co.uk

Related articles

• A golden mystery for New Zealand... (peter-petterson.blogspot.com)

GBE2: Blog on. Working for the man...

Image via Wikipedia

Working for the man
We have all had to work for the man in one category or another in our lives to support our families and ourselves,  and I recognise that many can't find fulltime employment at times. This is something prevalent in our various societies today. Some of us have managed to work in fields we love, others in areas through necessity, or through lack of choice and  because a pay check is a pay check and its all green stuff at the end of the day.

Then the day arrives and we no longer have to get up at the break of dawn or a couple of hours later. We can actually stay in for another hour or two. In New Zealand it is the big 65, and qualification for the universal National Superannuation, or in realspeak: the 'old age pension'. You won't be travelling around the world in a cruise ship on 'super', but at least you are recognised as being a senior citizen and don't have to go downtown to a Work and Income office for a third degree and prove why you should receive a welfare payment. This despite the fact you may have been made redundant  after working thirty years for the same company and your redundancy and severance payment  had long run out.

Some of us, of course, never stop working. Some continue in volunteer work until they lack mobility, but others of us have taken on roles of care-giving to family members and the magic 65 makes little difference. We, for instance, have raised our grandson since he was eight years old with special needs and learning difficulties. He developed mental health issues at age 15 yrs and the workload increased. but at the age of 20 yrs his reliance on us has not diminished. And is unlikely to change anytime soon. So in a away we are contining to work for the man:

Working Man Blues

Everybody's working for the man again

But we still recall those days when we did work for the man, and our relationships with our fellow employees - our 'workmates'. And sometimes when the working day was done we would all move down to the local bar or tavern for an hour or two for a yarn, a song, recall the past and battles won and lost, and a drink or two before moving off to our families and homes.

Those were the days.

Stay here and drink


Chain gang





http://anzacbloggersunite.blog.co.uk

Related articles

• Future-proofing pensions (homepaddock.wordpress.com)
• Flemish government seeks solution for excessive teaching pensions (expatica.com)
• 'No saving' in upping pension age (bbc.co.uk)
• How can I leverage volunteer work on my CV? (career-advice.monster.co.uk)
• B.C. politician calls welfare challenge 'eye-opening, humbling' (canada.com)
• Civil service pensions 'still gold plated' (bbc.co.uk)
• Still no deal on teacher pensions (mirror.co.uk)
• National News: Still no deal on teacher pensions (coventrytelegraph.net)
• Entitlements & ratchets (stumblingandmumbling.typepad.com)
• Thoughts For The New Year... (twistedsonia.wordpress.com)

Grammar tips for you writers...

Grammar Tips for you writers...

---

Ads

• Play Bingo Online
  Compare the Best In Bingo Sites, Free Sign Up Bonuses, Huge Jackpots.
  bingogamesforfree.co.uk

Grammar Tips for you...

1. Avoid alliteration. Always.
2. Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do.
3. Employ the vernacular.
4. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
5. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
6. Remember to never split an infinitive.
7. Contractions aren't necessary.
8. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
9. One should never generalize.
10. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
11. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
12. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
13. Be more or less specific.
14. Understatement is always best.
15. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
16. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
17. The passive voice is to be avoided.
18. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
19. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
20. Who needs rhetorical questions?
21. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
22. Don't never use a double negative.
23. capitalize every sentence and remember always end it with point
24. Do not put statements in the negative form.
25. Verbs have to agree with their subjects.
26. Proofread carefully to see if you words out.
27. If you reread your work, you can find on rereading a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing.
28. A writer must not shift your point of view.
29. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction. (Remember, too, a preposition is a terrible word to end a sentence with.)
30. Don't overuse exclamation marks!!
31. Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences, as of 10 or more words, to the irantecedents.
32. Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.
33. If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
34. Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing metaphors.
35. Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.
36. Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing.
37. Always pick on the correct idiom.
38. The adverb always follows the verb.
39. Last but not least, avoid cliches like the plague; They're old hat; seek viable alternatives.

Quick and Dirty tips

http://jokerswild.blog.co.uk

Related articles

• A golden mystery for New Zealand... (peter-petterson.blogspot.com)
• In Books: Writing Tools: 50 Essential Strategies for Every Writer by Roy Peter Clark (reflectionsinapuddle.wordpress.com)
• subject-grammar (kautsarz.wordpress.com)
• Which kind of pronoun would be used to show when it receives the action of a verb (wiki.answers.com)
• Unit 1 Subjects, Predicates, and Sentences - PDF Version (slideshare.net)
• What's the verb: Transitive or Intransitive? (writeorrevisedaily.wordpress.com)
• Parts of Speech (easyenglishispossible.wordpress.com)
• Strengthen your verbs (frootbat31.wordpress.com)

Paulinemom's Black Robbers...

 

 

---

• 
  

  Ads

  • Looking for Women?
    Let Cupid.com find you a woman of your dreams. Join now.
    www.Cupid.com

  

  BLACK ROBBERS

  by paulinemom http://jokerswild.blog.co.uk

  This one was sent to me by a dear friend...
  

  It is a true story....

  

  On a recent weekend in Atlantic City , a woman won a bucketful of quarters at a slot machine.
  She took a break from the slots for dinner with her husband in the hotel dining room. But first she wanted to stash the quarters in her room. I'll be right back and we'll go to eat' she told her husband and carried the coin-laden bucket to the elevator.
  As she was about to walk into the elevator she noticed two men already aboard. Both were black. One of them was very tall and had an intimidating figure. The woman froze. Her first thought was: 'These two are going to rob me.'
  Her next thought was: 'Don't be a bigot, they look like perfectly nice gentlemen.' But racial stereotypes are powerful, and fear immobilized her.
  Avoiding eye contact, she turned around stiffly and faced the elevator doors as they closed.
  A second passed, and then another second, and then another. Her fear increased! The elevator didn't move. Panic consumed her. 'My God' she thought, I'm trapped and about to be robbed!
  Her heart plummeted. Perspiration poured from every pore.
  Then one of the men said, 'Hit the floor.'
  Instinct told her to do what they told her.
  The bucket of quarters flew upwards as she threw out her arms and collapsed on the elevator floor. A shower of coins rained down on her.
  'Take my money and spare me', she prayed.
  More seconds passed. She heard one of the men say politely, 'Ma'am, if you'll just tell us what floor you're going to, we'll push the button.'
  The one who said it had a little trouble getting the words out. He was trying mightily to hold in a belly laugh. The woman lifted her head and looked up at the two men. They reached down to help her up.
  Confused, she struggled to her feet. 'When I told my friend here to hit the floor,' said the average sized one, I meant that he should hit the elevator button for our floor. I didn't mean for you to hit the floor, ma'am.' He spoke genially. He bit his lip. It was obvious he was having a hard time not laughing.
  The woman thought: 'My God, what a spectacle I've made of myself.'
  She was too humiliated to speak. The three of them gathered up the strewn quarters and refilled her bucket.
  When the elevator arrived at her floor they then insisted on walking her to her room. She seemed a little unsteady on her feet, and they were afraid she might not make it down the corridor.
  At her door they bid her a good evening.
  As she slipped into her room she could hear them roaring with laughter as they walked back to the elevator.
  The woman brushed herself off. She pulled herself together and went downstairs for dinner with her husband.
  The next morning flowers were delivered to her room; a dozen roses.
  Attached to EACH rose was a crisp one hundred-dollar bill.
  The card said: 'Thanks for the best laugh we've had in years.
  It was signed: Eddie Murphy & Michael Jordan (Just had to reproduce Paulinemom's post.)

Related articles

• A golden mystery for New Zealand... (peter-petterson.blogspot.com)
• When A City Falls - official trailer of a new documentary film about Christchurch earthquakes (peter-petterson.blogspot.com)
• 2nd Edition of 31 Days to Build a Better Blog - Coming Next Week (problogger.net)
• Tweets for January 4th (trommetter.com)

A new Australian flag - very funny...

http://www.australianblogs.com.au/blog/new-australia-map/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+AustralianBlogs+%28Australian+Blogs+Blog%29

http://anzacbloggersunite.blog.co.uk

Cornish nationalism is calling for more autonomy within the UK...

Image via Wikipedia

• Ads

  • New Zealand 100% Pure You
    Visit the Tourism New Zealand Site for information and travel advice
    NewZealand.com

  

  
  Cornish nationalists advocate either greater autonomy within England; a split to become the United Kingdom's fifth home nation; or status as a Crown Dependency equivalent to the Isle of Man.
• 
  Cornwall is considered a Celtic semi-autonomous part of the United Kingdom.
• 
  Cornish nationalism is an umbrella term that refers to a cultural, political and social movement based in Cornwall, the most southwestern part of the island of Great Britain, which has for centuries been administered as part of England, within the United Kingdom. It is usually based on three general arguments:
• 
  That Cornwall has a Celtic cultural identity separate from that of England, and that the Cornish people have a national, civic or ethnic identity separate from that of English people;
  that Cornwall should be granted a degree of devolution or autonomy, usually in the form of a Cornish regional assembly. It has its own flag.

       Cornwall is legally a territorial and constitutional Duchy with the right to veto Westminster legislation, not merely a county of England, and has never been formally incorporated into England via an Act of Union.

• 
  I know a little about the area: My mother lived on St Marys in the Scilly Isles in the 1950-60's. She remarried, after earlier divorcing my father, to a Cornishman who was the head chef on the liner Port Victor. She had two sons to him, both redheads - typical Cornishmen and Celtics. My stepfather retired and moved his family to Christchurch, NZ.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Duchy_of_Cornwall

http://communitybloggersevolve.blog.co.uk

Related articles

• Cornish devolution campaign revived by show of pan-Celtic political unity (independent.co.uk)
• Duchy of Cornwall - The Royal Scam (politics.ie)
• Super-fast broadband for Cornwall (confused.com)
• The Duchy of Cornwall estate: private possession or public authority? (telegraph.co.uk)
• Ready for the 'Cornish pound'? (punjapit.wordpress.com)
• Prince Charles criticised over metal detector beach charging plan (guardian.co.uk)
• Business insurance news: Cornwall hit by flooding (premierlinedirect.co.uk)
• Vote if you Love Cornish Food (beyondthepasty.wordpress.com)
• Treat yourself to a holiday in Cornwall (ukcredit.com)

Marriage is good for you - whether straight or gay...

Hot Topics

Hot Topics

Let’s face it; waiting for the world to change is making us sick. Lets get married!

Yes, we could pop pills more often—or we could move to one of six states that support full marriage equality rights, according to a new study published in The American Journal of Public Health.

Researchers from Columbia University surveyed more than 1,200 patients (all of them gay men) and their billing statements at a large Massachusetts health clinic 12 months before and after the state legalized same-sex marriage in 2004

.

As it turns out, man-on-man matrimony makes us healthier: After same-sex marriage equality passed, researchers saw a 13 percent decrease in doctor visits and a 14 percent decrease in health care costs among gay and bisexual men, particularly for those who reported high blood pressure, depression, anxiety and sexually transmitted diseases.

“What we are saying is that when you legalize same-sex marriage it kind of changes the social environment around gays and lesbians,” lead author Mark Hatzenbuehler said in a news release, as reported by MSNBC. “And that reduces social stigma and stress that has downstream health consequences.”

More and more, America is finding homophobia difficult to explain. Thanks a lot, science!

This is something that  hetero society has long claimed. Close physical relationships are good for you - whether straight or gay.

Read the full article here.

http://blogging-along-with-pete.wallinside.com

Facebook

Comment (0)

Edit post

Related articles

• Same-Sex Marriage Laws Reduce Doctor Visits And Health Care Costs For Gay Men (medicalnewstoday.com)
• Call for patience in same sex marriage push (smh.com.au)
• Same-sex marriage boosts gay men's health, study suggests (cbsnews.com)
• Marriage Equality Equals Healther Society (lezgetreal.com)
• Same-sex marriage make healthier, a new study finds. (jontambek.wordpress.com)
• Gay Married Men Enjoy Better Health Than Single Gay Men (medicalnewstoday.com)
• Same-sex marriage laws reduce doctor visits and health care costs for gay men (scienceblog.com)
• Same-sex marriage laws reduce doctor visits and health care costs for gay men (eurekalert.org)
• Marriage Equality Equals Healther Society (pinkbananaworld.com)
• Ricky Martin To Wed In New York (lezgetreal.com)